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Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Start in downtown San Diego and drive east. The further you go, the cheaper the rent. Elected officials get redder, poverty rates get higher, and refugee resettlement numbers get bigger. Billboards for gun expos line the freeway, and there’s a hole-in-the-wall falafel shop on every corner.

When the United States invaded Iraq in 2003, the fallout resulted in more than three million Iraqis being forced from their homes. Over 18,000 of them resettled in San Diego County. As rent goes up closer to the ocean, refugee resettlement agencies are placing new arrivals in areas further east like El Cajon, a neighborhood nicknamed “Little Baghdad.” Storefronts are full of Arabic script, markets are full of Arabic ingredients, and apartment complexes are full of Arabic conversation. Iraqi cuisine offerings are ample, ranging from $2 sandwich shops to higher-end, sit-down fare.

While East County is known for its Middle Eastern communities, it is also known for its conservative politics. California’s 50th district is represented by staunch conservative Duncan Hunter, who also happens to be an Iraq and Afghanistan war veteran. On a national level, Donald Trump’s policies have resulted in fewer refugees arriving in the country from Muslim majority countries, including Iraq. At the close of the 2018 fiscal year, San Diego’s annual incoming Iraqi refugee count came to exactly 12, compared to thousands in past years.

In the context of the local and national political climate, social tensions can run high among the various communities of El Cajon. Here, the Iraqi food scene offers an opportunity for cultural exchange. As one Iraqi resident explains, eating at East County restaurants helps people learn about another culture’s “mentality, how they live, how they help people, how they eat food.”

Al Azayem sits in the heart of Little Baghdad on Main Street, sharing a dusty parking lot with an optical shop, a barber, and a tailor. A more casual, diner-style Iraqi eatery, Al Azayem features a wide menu, a high turnover, and freshly-made offerings that draw hungry Iraqi and non-Iraqi customers alike. Customers pay at the counter and take-out orders abound--but those who dine in are treated to Iraqi hospitality, as restaurant staff eagerly run around providing bread, soup, and salad free of charge. A combo intended for three people includes six juicy, spicy chicken and beef kabobs plus a pound of chicken and beef shawarma on the side. American flags and “I Voted” stickers adorn the register, while Arabic soccer commentary blares from a TV.

Eight years ago, US forces left Iraq in accordance with the US-Iraqi agreement to withdraw. Five years ago, they returned to combat ISIS. While stability, security, and peace have yet to return to Iraq, those displaced by the conflict continue to build their lives in new homes. Mazin Majeed, the owner of Al Azayem, arrived from Iraq as a refugee in 2009 and opened the restaurant in 2012. He says that the flavors and freshness of his food are as authentic as possible, but it’s still not the same as eating it in Iraq. “You love it over there, but what do you do?” he says. “Do I miss Iraq? No. I miss the Iraq from before, yes. But not Iraq now.”

Seven thousand miles away from the battlefield, Majeed serves his favorite, beloved dishes to Iraqis and Americans alike. His diverse clientele shares polished black tables and sugar shakers, tearing chunks of fresh saj bread to dip into soup. Their experiences of the US-Iraq War are drastically different, but they share a craving for Iraqi food.

Lunchtime diners at Al Azayem--teenagers, coworkers, families, and lone diners-- answer the same five questions about home, belonging, food, war, and goodbyes. They talk of home in El Cajon, Iraq, Mexico, Lebanon, Dubai, and across the United States. Their stories paint pictures of shawarma, George Bush, grandmothers, B-52 bombers, losing dignity, and life as a marine. Their perspectives resist any universal truths, except for one thing: an appreciation for good food, cheap prices, and great customer service.

Customer 1
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

We are all human beings. The group that is most important for me is human beings.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

I eat here almost everyday, and I grab some food for my non-Iraqi friends. They like it so much. I feel Iraqi food is more healthy. Everything we use, we just cook it together--vegetables and other things--and there we go. It’s fresh.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yes, sure. Because here, I feel safe, and I feel happy. I'm part of a leadership academy, and I’m volunteering and advocating for many things over here. Home is when you feel you are existing in this world: when people are asking about you, people are taking care of you, you are important for them, and you are real.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

The most important thing that I left? My kids. In Iraq. They’re still there with my ex-husband. This is the most painful thing. I’m trying to work on this, and make myself ok. And they are twins, baby boys, still babies. In February 2019, they will be three years.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

Well it’s a big error, that war. Because when it happened, it was about political things--which are not real things. But the people who paid for it are the innocent people who died. I was in the middle of everything. We never left our houses, just stayed inside for our safety. We would hear bombing. We heard airplanes. We heard all different sounds. I can still remember the sound of the B-52, F-18, F-16…We stayed inside and listened. For years. And after that, we said, "Ok, the war is ended," and started doing our activities. But then other things came up, Sunni and Shiite problems. People started killing each other, and then ISIS came over, and then we had a lot of problems in Iraq…A lot of problems. Now, every time when we pass over a problem, something else will come up. My country never became stable after the war.

Customer 2
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Sports people. American football. I was born in Iraq, but then I came when I was 5. / I came when I was 10.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

We were trying to get Subway, but he forgot his money. / So we came to my dad because he works right around the corner. I got some money from my dad and we came here. / And we came here because it tastes good. / It’s our food, because we’re Middle Eastern. We’re used to it. / When we eat it for the first time in a long time, we finally feel full.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Kind of, because everything we know is around here. We’ve been here for a while. / I feel home when I feel comfortable and I’m used to stuff.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

My grandma and grandpa, we had to leave them behind when we came here. But then six years later they came too, so now we’re together again. / For my situation, I was in Iraq with all my family there. But then there was an explosion outside my house, in my front yard. So then my dad thought it was really unsafe, and we moved to Lebanon. We stayed there for two years, and then we came here. It’s been five, six years? I had to leave my whole family behind and we’re still not connected.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I don’t remember anything about that. We don’t know anything. My mom told me I was born during the war, in 2003. That’s all I heard about the war. She didn’t tell me about what it was like to give birth during the war. They don’t like talking about it. / We’re not interested in that stuff. / Yeah / We don’t really ask, but they discuss it among themselves. Sometimes they refer to it, and they'll say, "If you were in Iraq you would have been getting an ass whooping."

Customer 3
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Well, we’re Iraqis. We’re from Iraq. We’re just regular locals.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

This particular restaurant, it tastes really good. It’s really similar to the food from when I grew up. The cook’s really good, you can smell. My mom said you’re my guest, you want to eat something?

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

No, no. This doesn't feel like home. My mom says it’s safe, but it doesn’t feel the same. She says home is having a reliable life, a stable life. We’re not stable and happy because we’ve been through a lot. She says we feel like we got humiliated by some people in this country. They don’t treat us right because they think we are not from here. When we were in Iraq, nobody can tell us, “This is not your country, go home.” This country . . . I love it, it’s a beautiful country. But you got a bunch of people who tell you to go home. So that . . . that hurts. My mom says food doesn’t make me feel happy, or like I'm home. She says, I could survive by eating bread and onions and be happy. With my country, I have my dignity, and people honor and respect me.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So my mom said, a lot of countries, they kind of came and got into Iraq's business, and they ruined the country. They did not know who was who. Before, it was a beautiful country. It was stable. Safe. So it was not easy at all to make the decision to leave.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

My brother, the Iraqi militia shot him in the foot. They kidnapped my little brother. They chased my other brother and they shot him three, four times, but he survived. They shot me. And they kidnapped my dad, tortured him to death. It was during the time the US was there. It wasn’t secure. Nobody cared. And now here, my mom wears a hijab. People don’t even know our story. All they know is that they don’t like you. "Get out of here!" They forget that all the other Americans are immigrants, except the natives. America is strong because we’re combined. A lot of people don’t understand this. They judge what they see. But they don’t realize I worked with the US for many years. I saved so many marines in my life. Thousands of troops. I met President Bush--he’s the one that brought me here. He gave me the presidential coin and said, "I want this guy to be in the US in the next year." What can we do? We try to survive.

Customer 4
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

My family and friends. It’s hard to feel an alliance with the US, right now, for me. I guess the world? And San Diego? Also, I cannot be friends with people who have an interest in low quality food. Honestly. Like, it has to be good food. Like, you know, I cook a lot, and so that’s important to me because one of the things that I derive pleasure from is being able to cook a nice meal for friends and having them have the context to appreciate it. And if someone is just like, going to Denny’s or something, it’s just like . . . I know I can’t trust your opinion on food, and what else can’t I trust your opinion on?

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

It’s delicious, and I live in San Diego, so I was out hiking, and pretty much any time I go east of here out hiking, I make a point to stop at this restaurant on my way back. It’s just, to me, El Cajon, I think of Iraqi food. The spice blends, you get all the different combinations. With Middle Eastern food specifically, it was the first time I knew that there was cinnamon in the meat that I was eating, and it shocked me, right? Like, wait, what? I can do that? Because to me I’d only ever associated cinnamon with sweets and things like that. After I’ve hiked, I’m generally in a good mood, because I’m feeling kind of free and everything. It doesn’t have to be a celebration, but it’s . . . I don’t know, I mean, to have food curiosity is kind of the same as having intellectual curiosity. Or it is intellectual curiosity. It’s the ability to be surprised. If I’m going to an American restaurant, or only ever going to Italian restaurants, or whatever it happens to be--it’s very difficult to surprise you. I mean they could, but a very easy way to be surprised is just to go to other culture’s cuisines.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

It does not. I mean, I’ve got a daughter now, so I have her and my wife, and we have a small but close group of friends…so it feels the most home since anywhere in a long time. Feeling like home is the food for me. Having access to good food, but also the ingredients. Food plays a part, but it’s probably more the people.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So I lived in Brazil for about three years, and I love the place. But unfortunately I had to leave there. I mean it wasn’t devastating, it was time to move on, but, yeah I don’t know. I was in the northeast in a city called El Salvador, and it’s just a really rich city culturally, and it has a very strong music environment. It’s got a really interesting cuisine, there were really strong flavors . . . It wasn’t my home country, so there’s different things involved with that, you know. I was always seen as an outsider there. There was no way I could not be. Of that specific city at least 90% of that city has at least mixed African blood. I’m much taller than the people there, lighter skinned than the people there, so I was always seen as an outsider. The Brazilians were incredibly nice to me and everything else, so that wasn’t an issue, but it’s just, there’s cultural things you may not understand, and whatever else. And then, you know, I was leaving a place with crystal clear waters, fantastic beaches. And the second time I was leaving, I was leaving not to come to San Diego, but Kentucky, and I’d never been there before. So it was just like, leaving here, to go to Kentucky. My brother lived there at the time so it was ok, but it was a shock to me. And not only that, it’s just having that different perspective. I'm coming back and I’m looking at things with a critical eye in the United States. And while I was in Brazil, I’d heard people saying there's almost more of a culture shock going back to your own country because you weren’t expecting it. Right? You’re expecting to be able to just slop back in and not having anything. But so I come back, and yeah, it’s a shock to the system.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I was in the Marine Corps prior to the war. I got out on August 30, 2001. I had been on a deployment, and we were in Bahrain when the USS Cole got bombed so we had to go over there to help recover the ship. So I’m coming back as the ramp-up was happening. You had all the rhetoric of Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld, and Bush, talking about the war and leading up to it. And I just remember thinking . . . It felt like the lies that were told to us when I was in the military. It was the same formula for the lies that we got told for why we were doing something, when the reason--there was no reason, it was just--whatever, you know, hate. To me it seems like you don’t truly have legitimate reasons to go to Iraq, so you’re creating them. And the fact that you’re lying to me about certain things, it just doesn’t seem right. It’s difficult, because I know people who left Iraq prior to the war because Saddam Hussein started persecuting minority groups and things like that. It was obviously not a good situation, but we made it even less stable by going there. So the specifics of the war itself? Honestly I don’t remember much about it, which is an odd thing. I did not want to be part of it. Everything started turning into a gigantic mess. The “mission accomplished” was pretty quick, right? But, yeah. Anyway. I should probably get going.

Customer 5
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

I identify as Mexican, and I think I have a strong connection to certain parts of Mexico. Mazatlan particularly. I like trying different foods, so any people who can introduce a food that I don’t know. That’s why we’re here!

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

Well for me, I’ve tried shawarma with my friend, and I really liked it. I like trying different foods but I’m not adventurous, so I need to go with someone who knows so I know what to order. I work in El Cajon but I don’t live in El Cajon, and I feel like El Cajon is the best melting pot as far as food goes, and if I’m here, there’s so much better food. And food is a way to try to get to know another culture. I feel like that’s an inviting way.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yeah I was born and raised here so it’s home for me. It’s memories that make a home. I used to work here and then I left and I came back. So El Cajon in general, I’m like oh, I remember going down this street. It brings back memories and makes me kinda nostalgic. And then, going back to people that you know. I’ve been here my whole life, and I have memories in all parts of the county except for north county. You know, I have a lot of memories of the different parts, and then as I meet new people, I create new memories that I then kinda gathered.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

Well for me, I immediately think of Mazatlan. I would go there often, almost yearly as a child. And then I remember when I was a senior in high school, leaving, and thinking, "I’m probably not going to be coming back here that often." I remember leaving that place and friends that I’ve made over the years. And I have a lot of family over there too, but family stays. Like sometimes you almost have to keep up connections with other people in order to keep the connection. So I remember having to leave some people that it was really hard to, and I still think of them a lot actually. And I have kids now and I try to have them go often, and they both traveled there at least twice, but now, like, I don’t. Like my kids are five and eight and they haven’t been there in a couple years. So, I’m just scared that they’re not going to know that place. Like I do at least.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I remember being worried for my brother because he was the prime age to be able to go into the military. I remember being worried that there were gonna invoke the draft. I remember not being happy with the fact that we were at war. I kind of have a very negative opinion of military, and not military people, but generally what we’re doing, and I feel like sometimes, the United States--I’m American--but the United States like kinda imposes themselves on other countries and beliefs. I feel that I know people who have advanced in war, and I imagine the things they do to get that are not nice. And a lot of unnecessary death. That’s how I pictured it. I picture a very ugly thing.

Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Start in downtown San Diego and drive east. The further you go, the cheaper the rent. Elected officials get redder, poverty rates get higher, and refugee resettlement numbers get bigger. Billboards for gun expos line the freeway, and there’s a hole-in-the-wall falafel shop on every corner.

When the United States invaded Iraq in 2003, the fallout resulted in more than three million Iraqis being forced from their homes. Over 18,000 of them resettled in San Diego County. As rent goes up closer to the ocean, refugee resettlement agencies are placing new arrivals in areas further east like El Cajon, a neighborhood nicknamed “Little Baghdad.” Storefronts are full of Arabic script, markets are full of Arabic ingredients, and apartment complexes are full of Arabic conversation. Iraqi cuisine offerings are ample, ranging from $2 sandwich shops to higher-end, sit-down fare.

While East County is known for its Middle Eastern communities, it is also known for its conservative politics. California’s 50th district is represented by staunch conservative Duncan Hunter, who also happens to be an Iraq and Afghanistan war veteran. On a national level, Donald Trump’s policies have resulted in fewer refugees arriving in the country from Muslim majority countries, including Iraq. At the close of the 2018 fiscal year, San Diego’s annual incoming Iraqi refugee count came to exactly 12, compared to thousands in past years.

In the context of the local and national political climate, social tensions can run high among the various communities of El Cajon. Here, the Iraqi food scene offers an opportunity for cultural exchange. As one Iraqi resident explains, eating at East County restaurants helps people learn about another culture’s “mentality, how they live, how they help people, how they eat food.”

Al Azayem sits in the heart of Little Baghdad on Main Street, sharing a dusty parking lot with an optical shop, a barber, and a tailor. A more casual, diner-style Iraqi eatery, Al Azayem features a wide menu, a high turnover, and freshly-made offerings that draw hungry Iraqi and non-Iraqi customers alike. Customers pay at the counter and take-out orders abound--but those who dine in are treated to Iraqi hospitality, as restaurant staff eagerly run around providing bread, soup, and salad free of charge. A combo intended for three people includes six juicy, spicy chicken and beef kabobs plus a pound of chicken and beef shawarma on the side. American flags and “I Voted” stickers adorn the register, while Arabic soccer commentary blares from a TV.

Eight years ago, US forces left Iraq in accordance with the US-Iraqi agreement to withdraw. Five years ago, they returned to combat ISIS. While stability, security, and peace have yet to return to Iraq, those displaced by the conflict continue to build their lives in new homes. Mazin Majeed, the owner of Al Azayem, arrived from Iraq as a refugee in 2009 and opened the restaurant in 2012. He says that the flavors and freshness of his food are as authentic as possible, but it’s still not the same as eating it in Iraq. “You love it over there, but what do you do?” he says. “Do I miss Iraq? No. I miss the Iraq from before, yes. But not Iraq now.”

Seven thousand miles away from the battlefield, Majeed serves his favorite, beloved dishes to Iraqis and Americans alike. His diverse clientele shares polished black tables and sugar shakers, tearing chunks of fresh saj bread to dip into soup. Their experiences of the US-Iraq War are drastically different, but they share a craving for Iraqi food.

Lunchtime diners at Al Azayem--teenagers, coworkers, families, and lone diners-- answer the same five questions about home, belonging, food, war, and goodbyes. They talk of home in El Cajon, Iraq, Mexico, Lebanon, Dubai, and across the United States. Their stories paint pictures of shawarma, George Bush, grandmothers, B-52 bombers, losing dignity, and life as a marine. Their perspectives resist any universal truths, except for one thing: an appreciation for good food, cheap prices, and great customer service.

Customer 1
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

We are all human beings. The group that is most important for me is human beings.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

I eat here almost everyday, and I grab some food for my non-Iraqi friends. They like it so much. I feel Iraqi food is more healthy. Everything we use, we just cook it together--vegetables and other things--and there we go. It’s fresh.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yes, sure. Because here, I feel safe, and I feel happy. I'm part of a leadership academy, and I’m volunteering and advocating for many things over here. Home is when you feel you are existing in this world: when people are asking about you, people are taking care of you, you are important for them, and you are real.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

The most important thing that I left? My kids. In Iraq. They’re still there with my ex-husband. This is the most painful thing. I’m trying to work on this, and make myself ok. And they are twins, baby boys, still babies. In February 2019, they will be three years.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

Well it’s a big error, that war. Because when it happened, it was about political things--which are not real things. But the people who paid for it are the innocent people who died. I was in the middle of everything. We never left our houses, just stayed inside for our safety. We would hear bombing. We heard airplanes. We heard all different sounds. I can still remember the sound of the B-52, F-18, F-16…We stayed inside and listened. For years. And after that, we said, "Ok, the war is ended," and started doing our activities. But then other things came up, Sunni and Shiite problems. People started killing each other, and then ISIS came over, and then we had a lot of problems in Iraq…A lot of problems. Now, every time when we pass over a problem, something else will come up. My country never became stable after the war.

Customer 2
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Sports people. American football. I was born in Iraq, but then I came when I was 5. / I came when I was 10.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

We were trying to get Subway, but he forgot his money. / So we came to my dad because he works right around the corner. I got some money from my dad and we came here. / And we came here because it tastes good. / It’s our food, because we’re Middle Eastern. We’re used to it. / When we eat it for the first time in a long time, we finally feel full.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Kind of, because everything we know is around here. We’ve been here for a while. / I feel home when I feel comfortable and I’m used to stuff.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

My grandma and grandpa, we had to leave them behind when we came here. But then six years later they came too, so now we’re together again. / For my situation, I was in Iraq with all my family there. But then there was an explosion outside my house, in my front yard. So then my dad thought it was really unsafe, and we moved to Lebanon. We stayed there for two years, and then we came here. It’s been five, six years? I had to leave my whole family behind and we’re still not connected.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I don’t remember anything about that. We don’t know anything. My mom told me I was born during the war, in 2003. That’s all I heard about the war. She didn’t tell me about what it was like to give birth during the war. They don’t like talking about it. / We’re not interested in that stuff. / Yeah / We don’t really ask, but they discuss it among themselves. Sometimes they refer to it, and they'll say, "If you were in Iraq you would have been getting an ass whooping."

Customer 3
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Well, we’re Iraqis. We’re from Iraq. We’re just regular locals.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

This particular restaurant, it tastes really good. It’s really similar to the food from when I grew up. The cook’s really good, you can smell. My mom said you’re my guest, you want to eat something?

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

No, no. This doesn't feel like home. My mom says it’s safe, but it doesn’t feel the same. She says home is having a reliable life, a stable life. We’re not stable and happy because we’ve been through a lot. She says we feel like we got humiliated by some people in this country. They don’t treat us right because they think we are not from here. When we were in Iraq, nobody can tell us, “This is not your country, go home.” This country . . . I love it, it’s a beautiful country. But you got a bunch of people who tell you to go home. So that . . . that hurts. My mom says food doesn’t make me feel happy, or like I'm home. She says, I could survive by eating bread and onions and be happy. With my country, I have my dignity, and people honor and respect me.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So my mom said, a lot of countries, they kind of came and got into Iraq's business, and they ruined the country. They did not know who was who. Before, it was a beautiful country. It was stable. Safe. So it was not easy at all to make the decision to leave.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

My brother, the Iraqi militia shot him in the foot. They kidnapped my little brother. They chased my other brother and they shot him three, four times, but he survived. They shot me. And they kidnapped my dad, tortured him to death. It was during the time the US was there. It wasn’t secure. Nobody cared. And now here, my mom wears a hijab. People don’t even know our story. All they know is that they don’t like you. "Get out of here!" They forget that all the other Americans are immigrants, except the natives. America is strong because we’re combined. A lot of people don’t understand this. They judge what they see. But they don’t realize I worked with the US for many years. I saved so many marines in my life. Thousands of troops. I met President Bush--he’s the one that brought me here. He gave me the presidential coin and said, "I want this guy to be in the US in the next year." What can we do? We try to survive.

Customer 4
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

My family and friends. It’s hard to feel an alliance with the US, right now, for me. I guess the world? And San Diego? Also, I cannot be friends with people who have an interest in low quality food. Honestly. Like, it has to be good food. Like, you know, I cook a lot, and so that’s important to me because one of the things that I derive pleasure from is being able to cook a nice meal for friends and having them have the context to appreciate it. And if someone is just like, going to Denny’s or something, it’s just like . . . I know I can’t trust your opinion on food, and what else can’t I trust your opinion on?

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

It’s delicious, and I live in San Diego, so I was out hiking, and pretty much any time I go east of here out hiking, I make a point to stop at this restaurant on my way back. It’s just, to me, El Cajon, I think of Iraqi food. The spice blends, you get all the different combinations. With Middle Eastern food specifically, it was the first time I knew that there was cinnamon in the meat that I was eating, and it shocked me, right? Like, wait, what? I can do that? Because to me I’d only ever associated cinnamon with sweets and things like that. After I’ve hiked, I’m generally in a good mood, because I’m feeling kind of free and everything. It doesn’t have to be a celebration, but it’s . . . I don’t know, I mean, to have food curiosity is kind of the same as having intellectual curiosity. Or it is intellectual curiosity. It’s the ability to be surprised. If I’m going to an American restaurant, or only ever going to Italian restaurants, or whatever it happens to be--it’s very difficult to surprise you. I mean they could, but a very easy way to be surprised is just to go to other culture’s cuisines.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

It does not. I mean, I’ve got a daughter now, so I have her and my wife, and we have a small but close group of friends…so it feels the most home since anywhere in a long time. Feeling like home is the food for me. Having access to good food, but also the ingredients. Food plays a part, but it’s probably more the people.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So I lived in Brazil for about three years, and I love the place. But unfortunately I had to leave there. I mean it wasn’t devastating, it was time to move on, but, yeah I don’t know. I was in the northeast in a city called El Salvador, and it’s just a really rich city culturally, and it has a very strong music environment. It’s got a really interesting cuisine, there were really strong flavors . . . It wasn’t my home country, so there’s different things involved with that, you know. I was always seen as an outsider there. There was no way I could not be. Of that specific city at least 90% of that city has at least mixed African blood. I’m much taller than the people there, lighter skinned than the people there, so I was always seen as an outsider. The Brazilians were incredibly nice to me and everything else, so that wasn’t an issue, but it’s just, there’s cultural things you may not understand, and whatever else. And then, you know, I was leaving a place with crystal clear waters, fantastic beaches. And the second time I was leaving, I was leaving not to come to San Diego, but Kentucky, and I’d never been there before. So it was just like, leaving here, to go to Kentucky. My brother lived there at the time so it was ok, but it was a shock to me. And not only that, it’s just having that different perspective. I'm coming back and I’m looking at things with a critical eye in the United States. And while I was in Brazil, I’d heard people saying there's almost more of a culture shock going back to your own country because you weren’t expecting it. Right? You’re expecting to be able to just slop back in and not having anything. But so I come back, and yeah, it’s a shock to the system.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I was in the Marine Corps prior to the war. I got out on August 30, 2001. I had been on a deployment, and we were in Bahrain when the USS Cole got bombed so we had to go over there to help recover the ship. So I’m coming back as the ramp-up was happening. You had all the rhetoric of Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld, and Bush, talking about the war and leading up to it. And I just remember thinking . . . It felt like the lies that were told to us when I was in the military. It was the same formula for the lies that we got told for why we were doing something, when the reason--there was no reason, it was just--whatever, you know, hate. To me it seems like you don’t truly have legitimate reasons to go to Iraq, so you’re creating them. And the fact that you’re lying to me about certain things, it just doesn’t seem right. It’s difficult, because I know people who left Iraq prior to the war because Saddam Hussein started persecuting minority groups and things like that. It was obviously not a good situation, but we made it even less stable by going there. So the specifics of the war itself? Honestly I don’t remember much about it, which is an odd thing. I did not want to be part of it. Everything started turning into a gigantic mess. The “mission accomplished” was pretty quick, right? But, yeah. Anyway. I should probably get going.

Customer 5
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

I identify as Mexican, and I think I have a strong connection to certain parts of Mexico. Mazatlan particularly. I like trying different foods, so any people who can introduce a food that I don’t know. That’s why we’re here!

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

Well for me, I’ve tried shawarma with my friend, and I really liked it. I like trying different foods but I’m not adventurous, so I need to go with someone who knows so I know what to order. I work in El Cajon but I don’t live in El Cajon, and I feel like El Cajon is the best melting pot as far as food goes, and if I’m here, there’s so much better food. And food is a way to try to get to know another culture. I feel like that’s an inviting way.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yeah I was born and raised here so it’s home for me. It’s memories that make a home. I used to work here and then I left and I came back. So El Cajon in general, I’m like oh, I remember going down this street. It brings back memories and makes me kinda nostalgic. And then, going back to people that you know. I’ve been here my whole life, and I have memories in all parts of the county except for north county. You know, I have a lot of memories of the different parts, and then as I meet new people, I create new memories that I then kinda gathered.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

Well for me, I immediately think of Mazatlan. I would go there often, almost yearly as a child. And then I remember when I was a senior in high school, leaving, and thinking, "I’m probably not going to be coming back here that often." I remember leaving that place and friends that I’ve made over the years. And I have a lot of family over there too, but family stays. Like sometimes you almost have to keep up connections with other people in order to keep the connection. So I remember having to leave some people that it was really hard to, and I still think of them a lot actually. And I have kids now and I try to have them go often, and they both traveled there at least twice, but now, like, I don’t. Like my kids are five and eight and they haven’t been there in a couple years. So, I’m just scared that they’re not going to know that place. Like I do at least.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I remember being worried for my brother because he was the prime age to be able to go into the military. I remember being worried that there were gonna invoke the draft. I remember not being happy with the fact that we were at war. I kind of have a very negative opinion of military, and not military people, but generally what we’re doing, and I feel like sometimes, the United States--I’m American--but the United States like kinda imposes themselves on other countries and beliefs. I feel that I know people who have advanced in war, and I imagine the things they do to get that are not nice. And a lot of unnecessary death. That’s how I pictured it. I picture a very ugly thing.

Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Start in downtown San Diego and drive east. The further you go, the cheaper the rent. Elected officials get redder, poverty rates get higher, and refugee resettlement numbers get bigger. Billboards for gun expos line the freeway, and there’s a hole-in-the-wall falafel shop on every corner.

When the United States invaded Iraq in 2003, the fallout resulted in more than three million Iraqis being forced from their homes. Over 18,000 of them resettled in San Diego County. As rent goes up closer to the ocean, refugee resettlement agencies are placing new arrivals in areas further east like El Cajon, a neighborhood nicknamed “Little Baghdad.” Storefronts are full of Arabic script, markets are full of Arabic ingredients, and apartment complexes are full of Arabic conversation. Iraqi cuisine offerings are ample, ranging from $2 sandwich shops to higher-end, sit-down fare.

While East County is known for its Middle Eastern communities, it is also known for its conservative politics. California’s 50th district is represented by staunch conservative Duncan Hunter, who also happens to be an Iraq and Afghanistan war veteran. On a national level, Donald Trump’s policies have resulted in fewer refugees arriving in the country from Muslim majority countries, including Iraq. At the close of the 2018 fiscal year, San Diego’s annual incoming Iraqi refugee count came to exactly 12, compared to thousands in past years.

In the context of the local and national political climate, social tensions can run high among the various communities of El Cajon. Here, the Iraqi food scene offers an opportunity for cultural exchange. As one Iraqi resident explains, eating at East County restaurants helps people learn about another culture’s “mentality, how they live, how they help people, how they eat food.”

Al Azayem sits in the heart of Little Baghdad on Main Street, sharing a dusty parking lot with an optical shop, a barber, and a tailor. A more casual, diner-style Iraqi eatery, Al Azayem features a wide menu, a high turnover, and freshly-made offerings that draw hungry Iraqi and non-Iraqi customers alike. Customers pay at the counter and take-out orders abound--but those who dine in are treated to Iraqi hospitality, as restaurant staff eagerly run around providing bread, soup, and salad free of charge. A combo intended for three people includes six juicy, spicy chicken and beef kabobs plus a pound of chicken and beef shawarma on the side. American flags and “I Voted” stickers adorn the register, while Arabic soccer commentary blares from a TV.

Eight years ago, US forces left Iraq in accordance with the US-Iraqi agreement to withdraw. Five years ago, they returned to combat ISIS. While stability, security, and peace have yet to return to Iraq, those displaced by the conflict continue to build their lives in new homes. Mazin Majeed, the owner of Al Azayem, arrived from Iraq as a refugee in 2009 and opened the restaurant in 2012. He says that the flavors and freshness of his food are as authentic as possible, but it’s still not the same as eating it in Iraq. “You love it over there, but what do you do?” he says. “Do I miss Iraq? No. I miss the Iraq from before, yes. But not Iraq now.”

Seven thousand miles away from the battlefield, Majeed serves his favorite, beloved dishes to Iraqis and Americans alike. His diverse clientele shares polished black tables and sugar shakers, tearing chunks of fresh saj bread to dip into soup. Their experiences of the US-Iraq War are drastically different, but they share a craving for Iraqi food.

Lunchtime diners at Al Azayem--teenagers, coworkers, families, and lone diners-- answer the same five questions about home, belonging, food, war, and goodbyes. They talk of home in El Cajon, Iraq, Mexico, Lebanon, Dubai, and across the United States. Their stories paint pictures of shawarma, George Bush, grandmothers, B-52 bombers, losing dignity, and life as a marine. Their perspectives resist any universal truths, except for one thing: an appreciation for good food, cheap prices, and great customer service.

Customer 1
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

We are all human beings. The group that is most important for me is human beings.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

I eat here almost everyday, and I grab some food for my non-Iraqi friends. They like it so much. I feel Iraqi food is more healthy. Everything we use, we just cook it together--vegetables and other things--and there we go. It’s fresh.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yes, sure. Because here, I feel safe, and I feel happy. I'm part of a leadership academy, and I’m volunteering and advocating for many things over here. Home is when you feel you are existing in this world: when people are asking about you, people are taking care of you, you are important for them, and you are real.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

The most important thing that I left? My kids. In Iraq. They’re still there with my ex-husband. This is the most painful thing. I’m trying to work on this, and make myself ok. And they are twins, baby boys, still babies. In February 2019, they will be three years.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

Well it’s a big error, that war. Because when it happened, it was about political things--which are not real things. But the people who paid for it are the innocent people who died. I was in the middle of everything. We never left our houses, just stayed inside for our safety. We would hear bombing. We heard airplanes. We heard all different sounds. I can still remember the sound of the B-52, F-18, F-16…We stayed inside and listened. For years. And after that, we said, "Ok, the war is ended," and started doing our activities. But then other things came up, Sunni and Shiite problems. People started killing each other, and then ISIS came over, and then we had a lot of problems in Iraq…A lot of problems. Now, every time when we pass over a problem, something else will come up. My country never became stable after the war.

Customer 2
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Sports people. American football. I was born in Iraq, but then I came when I was 5. / I came when I was 10.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

We were trying to get Subway, but he forgot his money. / So we came to my dad because he works right around the corner. I got some money from my dad and we came here. / And we came here because it tastes good. / It’s our food, because we’re Middle Eastern. We’re used to it. / When we eat it for the first time in a long time, we finally feel full.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Kind of, because everything we know is around here. We’ve been here for a while. / I feel home when I feel comfortable and I’m used to stuff.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

My grandma and grandpa, we had to leave them behind when we came here. But then six years later they came too, so now we’re together again. / For my situation, I was in Iraq with all my family there. But then there was an explosion outside my house, in my front yard. So then my dad thought it was really unsafe, and we moved to Lebanon. We stayed there for two years, and then we came here. It’s been five, six years? I had to leave my whole family behind and we’re still not connected.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I don’t remember anything about that. We don’t know anything. My mom told me I was born during the war, in 2003. That’s all I heard about the war. She didn’t tell me about what it was like to give birth during the war. They don’t like talking about it. / We’re not interested in that stuff. / Yeah / We don’t really ask, but they discuss it among themselves. Sometimes they refer to it, and they'll say, "If you were in Iraq you would have been getting an ass whooping."

Customer 3
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Well, we’re Iraqis. We’re from Iraq. We’re just regular locals.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

This particular restaurant, it tastes really good. It’s really similar to the food from when I grew up. The cook’s really good, you can smell. My mom said you’re my guest, you want to eat something?

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

No, no. This doesn't feel like home. My mom says it’s safe, but it doesn’t feel the same. She says home is having a reliable life, a stable life. We’re not stable and happy because we’ve been through a lot. She says we feel like we got humiliated by some people in this country. They don’t treat us right because they think we are not from here. When we were in Iraq, nobody can tell us, “This is not your country, go home.” This country . . . I love it, it’s a beautiful country. But you got a bunch of people who tell you to go home. So that . . . that hurts. My mom says food doesn’t make me feel happy, or like I'm home. She says, I could survive by eating bread and onions and be happy. With my country, I have my dignity, and people honor and respect me.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So my mom said, a lot of countries, they kind of came and got into Iraq's business, and they ruined the country. They did not know who was who. Before, it was a beautiful country. It was stable. Safe. So it was not easy at all to make the decision to leave.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

My brother, the Iraqi militia shot him in the foot. They kidnapped my little brother. They chased my other brother and they shot him three, four times, but he survived. They shot me. And they kidnapped my dad, tortured him to death. It was during the time the US was there. It wasn’t secure. Nobody cared. And now here, my mom wears a hijab. People don’t even know our story. All they know is that they don’t like you. "Get out of here!" They forget that all the other Americans are immigrants, except the natives. America is strong because we’re combined. A lot of people don’t understand this. They judge what they see. But they don’t realize I worked with the US for many years. I saved so many marines in my life. Thousands of troops. I met President Bush--he’s the one that brought me here. He gave me the presidential coin and said, "I want this guy to be in the US in the next year." What can we do? We try to survive.

Customer 4
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

My family and friends. It’s hard to feel an alliance with the US, right now, for me. I guess the world? And San Diego? Also, I cannot be friends with people who have an interest in low quality food. Honestly. Like, it has to be good food. Like, you know, I cook a lot, and so that’s important to me because one of the things that I derive pleasure from is being able to cook a nice meal for friends and having them have the context to appreciate it. And if someone is just like, going to Denny’s or something, it’s just like . . . I know I can’t trust your opinion on food, and what else can’t I trust your opinion on?

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

It’s delicious, and I live in San Diego, so I was out hiking, and pretty much any time I go east of here out hiking, I make a point to stop at this restaurant on my way back. It’s just, to me, El Cajon, I think of Iraqi food. The spice blends, you get all the different combinations. With Middle Eastern food specifically, it was the first time I knew that there was cinnamon in the meat that I was eating, and it shocked me, right? Like, wait, what? I can do that? Because to me I’d only ever associated cinnamon with sweets and things like that. After I’ve hiked, I’m generally in a good mood, because I’m feeling kind of free and everything. It doesn’t have to be a celebration, but it’s . . . I don’t know, I mean, to have food curiosity is kind of the same as having intellectual curiosity. Or it is intellectual curiosity. It’s the ability to be surprised. If I’m going to an American restaurant, or only ever going to Italian restaurants, or whatever it happens to be--it’s very difficult to surprise you. I mean they could, but a very easy way to be surprised is just to go to other culture’s cuisines.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

It does not. I mean, I’ve got a daughter now, so I have her and my wife, and we have a small but close group of friends…so it feels the most home since anywhere in a long time. Feeling like home is the food for me. Having access to good food, but also the ingredients. Food plays a part, but it’s probably more the people.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So I lived in Brazil for about three years, and I love the place. But unfortunately I had to leave there. I mean it wasn’t devastating, it was time to move on, but, yeah I don’t know. I was in the northeast in a city called El Salvador, and it’s just a really rich city culturally, and it has a very strong music environment. It’s got a really interesting cuisine, there were really strong flavors . . . It wasn’t my home country, so there’s different things involved with that, you know. I was always seen as an outsider there. There was no way I could not be. Of that specific city at least 90% of that city has at least mixed African blood. I’m much taller than the people there, lighter skinned than the people there, so I was always seen as an outsider. The Brazilians were incredibly nice to me and everything else, so that wasn’t an issue, but it’s just, there’s cultural things you may not understand, and whatever else. And then, you know, I was leaving a place with crystal clear waters, fantastic beaches. And the second time I was leaving, I was leaving not to come to San Diego, but Kentucky, and I’d never been there before. So it was just like, leaving here, to go to Kentucky. My brother lived there at the time so it was ok, but it was a shock to me. And not only that, it’s just having that different perspective. I'm coming back and I’m looking at things with a critical eye in the United States. And while I was in Brazil, I’d heard people saying there's almost more of a culture shock going back to your own country because you weren’t expecting it. Right? You’re expecting to be able to just slop back in and not having anything. But so I come back, and yeah, it’s a shock to the system.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I was in the Marine Corps prior to the war. I got out on August 30, 2001. I had been on a deployment, and we were in Bahrain when the USS Cole got bombed so we had to go over there to help recover the ship. So I’m coming back as the ramp-up was happening. You had all the rhetoric of Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld, and Bush, talking about the war and leading up to it. And I just remember thinking . . . It felt like the lies that were told to us when I was in the military. It was the same formula for the lies that we got told for why we were doing something, when the reason--there was no reason, it was just--whatever, you know, hate. To me it seems like you don’t truly have legitimate reasons to go to Iraq, so you’re creating them. And the fact that you’re lying to me about certain things, it just doesn’t seem right. It’s difficult, because I know people who left Iraq prior to the war because Saddam Hussein started persecuting minority groups and things like that. It was obviously not a good situation, but we made it even less stable by going there. So the specifics of the war itself? Honestly I don’t remember much about it, which is an odd thing. I did not want to be part of it. Everything started turning into a gigantic mess. The “mission accomplished” was pretty quick, right? But, yeah. Anyway. I should probably get going.

Customer 5
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

I identify as Mexican, and I think I have a strong connection to certain parts of Mexico. Mazatlan particularly. I like trying different foods, so any people who can introduce a food that I don’t know. That’s why we’re here!

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

Well for me, I’ve tried shawarma with my friend, and I really liked it. I like trying different foods but I’m not adventurous, so I need to go with someone who knows so I know what to order. I work in El Cajon but I don’t live in El Cajon, and I feel like El Cajon is the best melting pot as far as food goes, and if I’m here, there’s so much better food. And food is a way to try to get to know another culture. I feel like that’s an inviting way.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yeah I was born and raised here so it’s home for me. It’s memories that make a home. I used to work here and then I left and I came back. So El Cajon in general, I’m like oh, I remember going down this street. It brings back memories and makes me kinda nostalgic. And then, going back to people that you know. I’ve been here my whole life, and I have memories in all parts of the county except for north county. You know, I have a lot of memories of the different parts, and then as I meet new people, I create new memories that I then kinda gathered.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

Well for me, I immediately think of Mazatlan. I would go there often, almost yearly as a child. And then I remember when I was a senior in high school, leaving, and thinking, "I’m probably not going to be coming back here that often." I remember leaving that place and friends that I’ve made over the years. And I have a lot of family over there too, but family stays. Like sometimes you almost have to keep up connections with other people in order to keep the connection. So I remember having to leave some people that it was really hard to, and I still think of them a lot actually. And I have kids now and I try to have them go often, and they both traveled there at least twice, but now, like, I don’t. Like my kids are five and eight and they haven’t been there in a couple years. So, I’m just scared that they’re not going to know that place. Like I do at least.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I remember being worried for my brother because he was the prime age to be able to go into the military. I remember being worried that there were gonna invoke the draft. I remember not being happy with the fact that we were at war. I kind of have a very negative opinion of military, and not military people, but generally what we’re doing, and I feel like sometimes, the United States--I’m American--but the United States like kinda imposes themselves on other countries and beliefs. I feel that I know people who have advanced in war, and I imagine the things they do to get that are not nice. And a lot of unnecessary death. That’s how I pictured it. I picture a very ugly thing.

Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Breaking Bread in Little Baghdad

Start in downtown San Diego and drive east. The further you go, the cheaper the rent. Elected officials get redder, poverty rates get higher, and refugee resettlement numbers get bigger. Billboards for gun expos line the freeway, and there’s a hole-in-the-wall falafel shop on every corner.

When the United States invaded Iraq in 2003, the fallout resulted in more than three million Iraqis being forced from their homes. Over 18,000 of them resettled in San Diego County. As rent goes up closer to the ocean, refugee resettlement agencies are placing new arrivals in areas further east like El Cajon, a neighborhood nicknamed “Little Baghdad.” Storefronts are full of Arabic script, markets are full of Arabic ingredients, and apartment complexes are full of Arabic conversation. Iraqi cuisine offerings are ample, ranging from $2 sandwich shops to higher-end, sit-down fare.

While East County is known for its Middle Eastern communities, it is also known for its conservative politics. California’s 50th district is represented by staunch conservative Duncan Hunter, who also happens to be an Iraq and Afghanistan war veteran. On a national level, Donald Trump’s policies have resulted in fewer refugees arriving in the country from Muslim majority countries, including Iraq. At the close of the 2018 fiscal year, San Diego’s annual incoming Iraqi refugee count came to exactly 12, compared to thousands in past years.

In the context of the local and national political climate, social tensions can run high among the various communities of El Cajon. Here, the Iraqi food scene offers an opportunity for cultural exchange. As one Iraqi resident explains, eating at East County restaurants helps people learn about another culture’s “mentality, how they live, how they help people, how they eat food.”

Al Azayem sits in the heart of Little Baghdad on Main Street, sharing a dusty parking lot with an optical shop, a barber, and a tailor. A more casual, diner-style Iraqi eatery, Al Azayem features a wide menu, a high turnover, and freshly-made offerings that draw hungry Iraqi and non-Iraqi customers alike. Customers pay at the counter and take-out orders abound--but those who dine in are treated to Iraqi hospitality, as restaurant staff eagerly run around providing bread, soup, and salad free of charge. A combo intended for three people includes six juicy, spicy chicken and beef kabobs plus a pound of chicken and beef shawarma on the side. American flags and “I Voted” stickers adorn the register, while Arabic soccer commentary blares from a TV.

Eight years ago, US forces left Iraq in accordance with the US-Iraqi agreement to withdraw. Five years ago, they returned to combat ISIS. While stability, security, and peace have yet to return to Iraq, those displaced by the conflict continue to build their lives in new homes. Mazin Majeed, the owner of Al Azayem, arrived from Iraq as a refugee in 2009 and opened the restaurant in 2012. He says that the flavors and freshness of his food are as authentic as possible, but it’s still not the same as eating it in Iraq. “You love it over there, but what do you do?” he says. “Do I miss Iraq? No. I miss the Iraq from before, yes. But not Iraq now.”

Seven thousand miles away from the battlefield, Majeed serves his favorite, beloved dishes to Iraqis and Americans alike. His diverse clientele shares polished black tables and sugar shakers, tearing chunks of fresh saj bread to dip into soup. Their experiences of the US-Iraq War are drastically different, but they share a craving for Iraqi food.

Lunchtime diners at Al Azayem--teenagers, coworkers, families, and lone diners-- answer the same five questions about home, belonging, food, war, and goodbyes. They talk of home in El Cajon, Iraq, Mexico, Lebanon, Dubai, and across the United States. Their stories paint pictures of shawarma, George Bush, grandmothers, B-52 bombers, losing dignity, and life as a marine. Their perspectives resist any universal truths, except for one thing: an appreciation for good food, cheap prices, and great customer service.

Customer 1
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

We are all human beings. The group that is most important for me is human beings.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

I eat here almost everyday, and I grab some food for my non-Iraqi friends. They like it so much. I feel Iraqi food is more healthy. Everything we use, we just cook it together--vegetables and other things--and there we go. It’s fresh.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yes, sure. Because here, I feel safe, and I feel happy. I'm part of a leadership academy, and I’m volunteering and advocating for many things over here. Home is when you feel you are existing in this world: when people are asking about you, people are taking care of you, you are important for them, and you are real.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

The most important thing that I left? My kids. In Iraq. They’re still there with my ex-husband. This is the most painful thing. I’m trying to work on this, and make myself ok. And they are twins, baby boys, still babies. In February 2019, they will be three years.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

Well it’s a big error, that war. Because when it happened, it was about political things--which are not real things. But the people who paid for it are the innocent people who died. I was in the middle of everything. We never left our houses, just stayed inside for our safety. We would hear bombing. We heard airplanes. We heard all different sounds. I can still remember the sound of the B-52, F-18, F-16…We stayed inside and listened. For years. And after that, we said, "Ok, the war is ended," and started doing our activities. But then other things came up, Sunni and Shiite problems. People started killing each other, and then ISIS came over, and then we had a lot of problems in Iraq…A lot of problems. Now, every time when we pass over a problem, something else will come up. My country never became stable after the war.

Customer 2
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Sports people. American football. I was born in Iraq, but then I came when I was 5. / I came when I was 10.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

We were trying to get Subway, but he forgot his money. / So we came to my dad because he works right around the corner. I got some money from my dad and we came here. / And we came here because it tastes good. / It’s our food, because we’re Middle Eastern. We’re used to it. / When we eat it for the first time in a long time, we finally feel full.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Kind of, because everything we know is around here. We’ve been here for a while. / I feel home when I feel comfortable and I’m used to stuff.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

My grandma and grandpa, we had to leave them behind when we came here. But then six years later they came too, so now we’re together again. / For my situation, I was in Iraq with all my family there. But then there was an explosion outside my house, in my front yard. So then my dad thought it was really unsafe, and we moved to Lebanon. We stayed there for two years, and then we came here. It’s been five, six years? I had to leave my whole family behind and we’re still not connected.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I don’t remember anything about that. We don’t know anything. My mom told me I was born during the war, in 2003. That’s all I heard about the war. She didn’t tell me about what it was like to give birth during the war. They don’t like talking about it. / We’re not interested in that stuff. / Yeah / We don’t really ask, but they discuss it among themselves. Sometimes they refer to it, and they'll say, "If you were in Iraq you would have been getting an ass whooping."

Customer 3
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

Well, we’re Iraqis. We’re from Iraq. We’re just regular locals.

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

This particular restaurant, it tastes really good. It’s really similar to the food from when I grew up. The cook’s really good, you can smell. My mom said you’re my guest, you want to eat something?

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

No, no. This doesn't feel like home. My mom says it’s safe, but it doesn’t feel the same. She says home is having a reliable life, a stable life. We’re not stable and happy because we’ve been through a lot. She says we feel like we got humiliated by some people in this country. They don’t treat us right because they think we are not from here. When we were in Iraq, nobody can tell us, “This is not your country, go home.” This country . . . I love it, it’s a beautiful country. But you got a bunch of people who tell you to go home. So that . . . that hurts. My mom says food doesn’t make me feel happy, or like I'm home. She says, I could survive by eating bread and onions and be happy. With my country, I have my dignity, and people honor and respect me.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So my mom said, a lot of countries, they kind of came and got into Iraq's business, and they ruined the country. They did not know who was who. Before, it was a beautiful country. It was stable. Safe. So it was not easy at all to make the decision to leave.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

My brother, the Iraqi militia shot him in the foot. They kidnapped my little brother. They chased my other brother and they shot him three, four times, but he survived. They shot me. And they kidnapped my dad, tortured him to death. It was during the time the US was there. It wasn’t secure. Nobody cared. And now here, my mom wears a hijab. People don’t even know our story. All they know is that they don’t like you. "Get out of here!" They forget that all the other Americans are immigrants, except the natives. America is strong because we’re combined. A lot of people don’t understand this. They judge what they see. But they don’t realize I worked with the US for many years. I saved so many marines in my life. Thousands of troops. I met President Bush--he’s the one that brought me here. He gave me the presidential coin and said, "I want this guy to be in the US in the next year." What can we do? We try to survive.

Customer 4
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

My family and friends. It’s hard to feel an alliance with the US, right now, for me. I guess the world? And San Diego? Also, I cannot be friends with people who have an interest in low quality food. Honestly. Like, it has to be good food. Like, you know, I cook a lot, and so that’s important to me because one of the things that I derive pleasure from is being able to cook a nice meal for friends and having them have the context to appreciate it. And if someone is just like, going to Denny’s or something, it’s just like . . . I know I can’t trust your opinion on food, and what else can’t I trust your opinion on?

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

It’s delicious, and I live in San Diego, so I was out hiking, and pretty much any time I go east of here out hiking, I make a point to stop at this restaurant on my way back. It’s just, to me, El Cajon, I think of Iraqi food. The spice blends, you get all the different combinations. With Middle Eastern food specifically, it was the first time I knew that there was cinnamon in the meat that I was eating, and it shocked me, right? Like, wait, what? I can do that? Because to me I’d only ever associated cinnamon with sweets and things like that. After I’ve hiked, I’m generally in a good mood, because I’m feeling kind of free and everything. It doesn’t have to be a celebration, but it’s . . . I don’t know, I mean, to have food curiosity is kind of the same as having intellectual curiosity. Or it is intellectual curiosity. It’s the ability to be surprised. If I’m going to an American restaurant, or only ever going to Italian restaurants, or whatever it happens to be--it’s very difficult to surprise you. I mean they could, but a very easy way to be surprised is just to go to other culture’s cuisines.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

It does not. I mean, I’ve got a daughter now, so I have her and my wife, and we have a small but close group of friends…so it feels the most home since anywhere in a long time. Feeling like home is the food for me. Having access to good food, but also the ingredients. Food plays a part, but it’s probably more the people.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

So I lived in Brazil for about three years, and I love the place. But unfortunately I had to leave there. I mean it wasn’t devastating, it was time to move on, but, yeah I don’t know. I was in the northeast in a city called El Salvador, and it’s just a really rich city culturally, and it has a very strong music environment. It’s got a really interesting cuisine, there were really strong flavors . . . It wasn’t my home country, so there’s different things involved with that, you know. I was always seen as an outsider there. There was no way I could not be. Of that specific city at least 90% of that city has at least mixed African blood. I’m much taller than the people there, lighter skinned than the people there, so I was always seen as an outsider. The Brazilians were incredibly nice to me and everything else, so that wasn’t an issue, but it’s just, there’s cultural things you may not understand, and whatever else. And then, you know, I was leaving a place with crystal clear waters, fantastic beaches. And the second time I was leaving, I was leaving not to come to San Diego, but Kentucky, and I’d never been there before. So it was just like, leaving here, to go to Kentucky. My brother lived there at the time so it was ok, but it was a shock to me. And not only that, it’s just having that different perspective. I'm coming back and I’m looking at things with a critical eye in the United States. And while I was in Brazil, I’d heard people saying there's almost more of a culture shock going back to your own country because you weren’t expecting it. Right? You’re expecting to be able to just slop back in and not having anything. But so I come back, and yeah, it’s a shock to the system.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I was in the Marine Corps prior to the war. I got out on August 30, 2001. I had been on a deployment, and we were in Bahrain when the USS Cole got bombed so we had to go over there to help recover the ship. So I’m coming back as the ramp-up was happening. You had all the rhetoric of Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld, and Bush, talking about the war and leading up to it. And I just remember thinking . . . It felt like the lies that were told to us when I was in the military. It was the same formula for the lies that we got told for why we were doing something, when the reason--there was no reason, it was just--whatever, you know, hate. To me it seems like you don’t truly have legitimate reasons to go to Iraq, so you’re creating them. And the fact that you’re lying to me about certain things, it just doesn’t seem right. It’s difficult, because I know people who left Iraq prior to the war because Saddam Hussein started persecuting minority groups and things like that. It was obviously not a good situation, but we made it even less stable by going there. So the specifics of the war itself? Honestly I don’t remember much about it, which is an odd thing. I did not want to be part of it. Everything started turning into a gigantic mess. The “mission accomplished” was pretty quick, right? But, yeah. Anyway. I should probably get going.

Customer 5
Who are your people?/What groups are you a part of that are important to you?

I identify as Mexican, and I think I have a strong connection to certain parts of Mexico. Mazatlan particularly. I like trying different foods, so any people who can introduce a food that I don’t know. That’s why we’re here!

Why did you eat here today?/What draws you about Iraqi food?

Well for me, I’ve tried shawarma with my friend, and I really liked it. I like trying different foods but I’m not adventurous, so I need to go with someone who knows so I know what to order. I work in El Cajon but I don’t live in El Cajon, and I feel like El Cajon is the best melting pot as far as food goes, and if I’m here, there’s so much better food. And food is a way to try to get to know another culture. I feel like that’s an inviting way.

Does San Diego feel like home to you? What makes home feel like home?/How do you know when you are home?

Yeah I was born and raised here so it’s home for me. It’s memories that make a home. I used to work here and then I left and I came back. So El Cajon in general, I’m like oh, I remember going down this street. It brings back memories and makes me kinda nostalgic. And then, going back to people that you know. I’ve been here my whole life, and I have memories in all parts of the county except for north county. You know, I have a lot of memories of the different parts, and then as I meet new people, I create new memories that I then kinda gathered.

Can you tell me about a time that you loved a person/place/thing, and you had to leave it behind?

Well for me, I immediately think of Mazatlan. I would go there often, almost yearly as a child. And then I remember when I was a senior in high school, leaving, and thinking, "I’m probably not going to be coming back here that often." I remember leaving that place and friends that I’ve made over the years. And I have a lot of family over there too, but family stays. Like sometimes you almost have to keep up connections with other people in order to keep the connection. So I remember having to leave some people that it was really hard to, and I still think of them a lot actually. And I have kids now and I try to have them go often, and they both traveled there at least twice, but now, like, I don’t. Like my kids are five and eight and they haven’t been there in a couple years. So, I’m just scared that they’re not going to know that place. Like I do at least.

Following the 2003 US invasion of Iraq, what was your experience of the US-Iraq War?

I remember being worried for my brother because he was the prime age to be able to go into the military. I remember being worried that there were gonna invoke the draft. I remember not being happy with the fact that we were at war. I kind of have a very negative opinion of military, and not military people, but generally what we’re doing, and I feel like sometimes, the United States--I’m American--but the United States like kinda imposes themselves on other countries and beliefs. I feel that I know people who have advanced in war, and I imagine the things they do to get that are not nice. And a lot of unnecessary death. That’s how I pictured it. I picture a very ugly thing.